We all know this scenario. Heck, I was recently accused of being one of these people! Someone actually had the gall to say I was a user! These former friends are pretty lost in some alternative facts. But thankfully, I have exorcised my life of such dark demons.

Friends With Something You Want

Have you ever been in a situation where someone suddenly pops up in your life and is your best pal? Then after a little while they drop the subtle need that you can help with? Then, poof…they’re gone! YUP! I’ve had some recent dealings with this kind of person – and for the most part, I am ok with it. WHY???? Because I am not on this earth to play tit for tat! One of the oldest philosophies ever in religion is “turn the other cheek”. I have turned the cheek quite a bit lately and that is totally OK.

Here’s How I Deal With It (and you can too)

Let it go! It’s that simple. I am not suggesting that you become everyone’s favorite welcome mat, but simply learn who those folks are and then quietly distance yourself from them.

“But, what if they are an important part of my life, Fitz?”, you ask…

Yeah, there’s that. So, I would suggest you rate them on some kind of scale. 1-10, A-F, whatever…and the higher they rank, the more you should do to try and fix the problem. I mean, there is always the option of being frankly honest with people. You could just blurt out, “Hey…so I never hear from you unless you need something.” I totally feel like doing that right now. I have some people who are currently not responding to my messages and yet when they need something and ask me, I respond immediately! Maybe I am just a better friend to them then they are to me, huh? Sad.

So, I’ve blathered quite a bit here and I am not sure I’ve given you any info you didn’t already know. I do know that you are in charge of your own life and don’t have to take anyone’s bull.

Choices are: turn the other cheek and slowly fade away from that person or confront them – all based on whether or not they have value in your life. It kind of sounds cheap and corporate – but then again, if they are only hitting you up on Facebook when they need you – and then not answering your questions in a reasonable timeframe, why bother with them at all?

You do You.

Peace and Love, Always…

Fitz

www.rocvox.com

Rule #1 in life should be: If you didn’t learn anything today, you’re doing it wrong! I don’t care if you are at the top of your field and there is literally NOTHING else about the tech or industry you can learn – look harder, because there is. Whether it is simply looking at something from a different point of view or meeting someone new in your industry and learning how THEY do things. It is all worthy of your attention. 

Better yet, how about learning how to be a human? The moment you get it all figured out and can operate at 100% perfect humanity, you had better let the rest of us know – because I think it is evolving faster than you can adapt. That in mind, you must always be learning something.

I Learned Something Yesterday!

What say you, Fitz? I learned how I shouldn’t let some little things affect my big picture. Yeah, it is not a revolutionary thought and perhaps you learned that when you were popping pimples in study hall! Well, I am new at this whole “growth” concept. I got all bent out of shape because a prospective client canceled their studio tour with no explanation. I was crestfallen! This actually was the company I thought of first for my services, even before I opened my business, so the thought of them coming in and checking out my wares was very exciting. A few other little things happened to me yesterday and I was starting to lose my positive glow. That was a huge mistake!

I got it back with a little meditation. I put on some great meditation music (for me it is a film score playlist on Spotify) and in a few minutes I had my center back. Let me tell you – if you have not tried this, do yourself a favor. Go out to your car or lock yourself in the bathroom for 5-10 minutes and focus on your breathing…it really helps. Think about your goals – live in the moment – feel the emotions as if you have already accomplished whatever it is you want to achieve. Oh it is so transformative.

If you didn’t know about this – you just learned something! At the very least, you learned that I like Film Scores on Spotify!

Peace and love, always…

Fitz

Check out my biz!

It is an unfortunate truth – but perception is reality. Some people have a very distorted perception of the world around them and although we see it differently than they, it is their reality and sometimes there is absolutely no way to alter their perceptions. My most recent experience with that is kind of heartbreaking for me. I lost some folks who I considered friends because their reality was quite different from mine. Now, I am not professing to be flawless by any means, but thankfully I was not the only one who perceived my version of the reality.

Beware of the Reality Benders

Yeah, they can actually bend the reality around them and due to their intense influence  over others, can bend their realities as well. I have known these folks – they have a strong will and they can totally pull the wool over their eyes. Take stock in your reality by sometimes checking in with someone you can trust and see what they perceive. 

It gets complicated and it reminds me of the film where the whole plot unfolds a  certain way and at the end the person is in a psych ward and the entire film was their own fantasy while in a straight jacket.

Peace and Love, always…

Fitz

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