Journal Entry 1: Climbing Out of the Pit of Despair 7/6/17
Today, I am climbing out of the Pit of Despair. My heart is not filled with revenge, nor do a search for my one true love. I just want to be healthy, positive and make a kick ass movie. I reference The Princess Bride (1987) very very often. Probably too often for most people. But that is because I have a passion for movies; specifically comedies. I am not a big horror guy – which is all the rage these days. Smart comedies, silly comedies, dramas and some action sprinkled in (Indiana Jones, et al.) are my jam. So, I have been wanting to make a movie since I can remember.
I saw Back to the Future and I was enamoured with Doc Brown’s JVC Camcorder. I wanted a video camera so badly I was going out of my mind. Most kids my age wanted G.I. Joe or Star Wars toys, but I wanted a video camera. (The JVC GR-C1)
My uncle Dennis had a Panasonic Video Camera that you attach to the VCR, so my filmmaking was limited to the living room of our small apartment. Well, it really consisted of stop motion-esque films of coasters moving around the table and Star Wars figures walking. Unfortunately, I had to give that camera back to my uncle and it was a while before I got another video camera. By then I had discovered girls, so yeah.
Now, skipping a LOT of time, I fast forward to this morning, July 6, 2017. I’ve been working on getting a feature film made. It was written by my friend Steve Miller and I jumped in to “help” with some of the story. We shot a teaser for about $1100.00 and are trying to raise $250,000 to make it. We can probably shoot it for considerably less, but it will not be how we want it. We want to pay people their correct rate. There are so many things we have to do to get this made and we are learning about it as we go. As a writer/director, I’ve directed about 6 or 7 short films – some of them I wrote or was on the writing team. But a feature is an entirely different breed of cat. It is a gnarly cat that lives in the woods behind my house and cries at night. It scratches at the door and leaves dead mice on the doorstep. He’s a nasty wild cat, but I have seen him be sweet from time to time…with others. With me he scratches and hisses. I believe he can be tamed. How? Perseverance.
So, over the past um – 8 months or so? Yeah, maybe longer…I’ve been very unhealthy. Not eating right, drinking too much, being lazy, etc. This has made me the weak link on my team. Those guys may not agree because they haven’t seen me be ineffective in this process, but I know I can be a better producer. So this morning I got back into the right frame of mind: lifting, running, eating right, meditation and positivity. I thought I needed to kick the evil feral cat so he wouldn’t come around crying outside my house at all hours. But now I realize, I just need to be patient and kind, feed him and make sure he safe. How is that for a terrible analogy? Well, this is a journal entry and I plan on doing this forever.